Nobody ever proven that life is a serious thing - thus I would advise You to sit back, relax and enjoy my company in a private room, I have a strong feeling You won't regret it.
What turns me on:
Having sex with many partners at the same time - I got excited even from the thought. Do You want to be one of them or shall I seek for other volunteers?
What turns me off:
A machine can be turned off... I cannot be ! If You play nice I'll squeeze every last drop of Your precious liquid out of Your system. It worth to treat me well, I think. ;o)